How is it that my efforts seem to go everywhere and nowhere at the same time?
I am slowly learning that time is not my own. Slowly.
When is time being wasted?
I sometimes feel like my time is wasted when I do those mundane everyday tasks like laundry, dishes and picking up after the family. Although I know in my head it is not a waste of time, it needs to be done and I am serving my family and God when I do those things. With that said, it is really easy to get discouraged when it is all undone in a fraction of the time it took to clean it up.
I hate looking for lost things which is happens way too often. While I am looking for keys, toys, shoes, camera cards, remote controls, and the like, I am thinking “This is such a waste of time”.
I get angrier the longer it takes and I get more desperate until the search ends. This is when I do A LOT of praying. 😉
Facebook yard sale sites are also time hogs. I have spent way too much time trying sell items on these sites to have people not show up or to have my items ignored or pushed to the bottom of the list within minutes because of other mothers trying to sell their stuff and bumping their posts to the top. Still I try. Eventually I just break and take all my stuff to Goodwill.
I’m not always sure my time is well spent when I work out because working out is one of those things that needs momentum and requires time upon time built upon itself in order to see any results. And that is the point of everything right? Results.
I know my time and efforts are being wasted when I play my little games on the iPad or computer. Specifically Candy Crush, which I am taking a little break from.
I would sometimes get frustrated with Reagan when she wouldn’t go to sleep easily and I had to pat her back for an amount of time that felt like forever. I particularly don’t love bath time because I want them to have time to play in the tub, but they obviously need supervision.The selfish me would rather wash them quickly and move on because sitting there and watching them is sometimes boring. I typically think about the other things I could be doing or would rather be doing.
Sometimes God whispers to me at these times and tells me that this what I am supposed to be doing right now. This is my job. And I know that there will be a time where I wont have to pat Reagan’s back and there will be a time when they will shower on their own (which is appropriate 😉 and I will probably miss this time. So I do genuinely try to take it in so I can remember it. That doesn’t always happen.
I have a large list of to-do’s, which I made myself, which no one is holding me to or shaming me if I don’t finish. I have a to-do list on the dry erase board in the kitchen. Another list on Wunderlist which I an access from my phone and more lists on the “Sticky Notes” on my PC. I get discouraged if things linger on the lists a little too long. “Get Passports” has been on my list for probably a year now. Are we going anywhere? No. But you never know what can happen.
My creative to-do list is ALWAYS growing as creativity breeds creativity. One idea leads to another and then another and then another.
Although I am not sure my time is best spent writing on my blog, sewing, DIYing, creating and imagining. I really enjoy it for the most part, but just because I enjoy something that doesn’t mean it is time well spent. (i.e CandyCrush).
It can also lead to more clutter as I leave projects out. (It’s such a waste of time to put it all away just to bring it back out. That is time I could be using actually working on the project.)
I often bite off more than I can chew and take on tasks that I am so sure I can finish quickly and easily. Emily’s coat is one example. Emily’s upcoming birthday party is the next example. I am trying to reign in all my ideas and not stress about it as it is supposed to be fun. I am getting better about this since I have almost 4 years of kiddy party planning under my belt now. Even now as I write this, I am trying to remember that “This is fun” and keep it all under control.
I have so many sewing patterns, projects, fabrics and ideas I want to try, but there is not that much time…or space.
Sometimes Most times I think If I just had a craft room like this…
I would be able to leave my crafts out and unfinished. Currently I have to take out my sewing machine and all the things that accompany it out of our bedroom, and set everything up on our kitchen table. That requires that I clear off the kitchen table first. And I don’t feel comfortable sewing knowing that there is unfolded laundry waiting for me in the living room or dishes in the sink.
If I had a craft room, it would be easier to ignore those things. 😉
Side Note: I spent Waaaaaaay too long looking for a very specific craft room I thought I saw once on then internet and after much searching I could not find it. More time…More time.
Another thought I have is “If it is not bringing in money or will potentially bring in money, is it time well spent?”
I thought if I was making money then my time was not wasted. “Time is Money” as they say. (Whatever that means.) This winter I spent a lot of time working on a project that I thought would lead to money and then more money, but it came to an immediate halt. More than mourning the loss of money and potentially more money, I mourned the time I spent to have it lead to nothing and how it was now gone. I firmly believe God closed that door for a purpose and that made the mourning period a little easier and little shorter. We can’t waste too much time feeling sorry for ourselves, can we?
So what is time well spent?
Time is well spent if it gives God glory. I know that much. Do I do that? I’m not sure.
There are a few things where I KNOW my time is not being wasted:
When I spend quality time with my girls vs. just keeping them occupied and merely alive.
When I am connecting with people, REALLY connecting with people.
When I am present in the moment.
When I am reading the Bible and seeking what it is that God wants me to know.
When I pray.
I am still learning that time is not my own. I have come a long way I think, but probably still have a ways to go. As time goes by I hope I can look back at this time and say “I have come a long way”. And I hope I will KNOW that I was doing what God wanted me to do that year, that month, that week, that day, that hour, that moment.
Thanks for reading, Hopefully you don’t feel it was time wasted 🙂
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, (NIV)
2 Corinthians 9:12
This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God.
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The featured image of the clocks for this post was taken from sadieolive.